"Discover What Husbands Cant Resist And Get His Affection Back"

Before we begin, your husband would like to share something with you.

"I know you probably don’t think I have deep feelings and I

know I certainly keep to myself at times, but I actually care

about you very deeply. I mean, I married you, and, in my

mind, that should count for a lot. I’d tell you more stuff, but

it seems that when I try, it doesn’t come out the right way or

it just makes you upset, which only makes me want to stop

talking to avoid a fight.

Please read this book. While not everything in it applies to

me, a lot of it does. In fact, I don’t mind one bit if you ask

me about some of the things you are about to read, because it

will show me that you really are starting to understand how I

think.

And lest you think that this is only for my benefit, let me tell

you as strongly as I can: I WANT YOU TO OWN MY HEART. I didn’t

get married so that I could ignore you. If I wanted that I would

have just stayed single. I married you because I couldn’t stop

myself. I may have even wanted to avoid marriage but I couldn’t.

Never mind what I said or how I made jokes about being tied

down. I married you because I wanted to spend my life with

someone special.

In the upcoming pages you will find a series of insights that

will unlock my heart and make me a slave to your approval. These

changes may or may not happen immediately, but give them enough

time to sink into my thick skull (weeks/months, not hours) and

they will work. In fact, I’m counting on you."

I am often asked by friends, those who have read my books, and

even my wife, what it is like to actually work with a therapist.

They often wonder what someone could possibly talk about for

weeks or even months. In truth, it is so hard to describe what

actually happens in the therapeutic setting between a therapist

and their client. It’s very powerful to be a part of the

transformation between the time when the individual first enters

my office to the change in their insights, as well as their

circumstances.

In spite of the benefits of seeing a counselor, many choose not

to participate in therapy or coaching for a variety of reasons,

all of which carry some degree of validity. It is with this view

in mind that I want to take you with me, behind the counselor’s

door, and invite you to observe how a therapist speaks with a

client regarding her husband. Notice how every bit of advice is

offered as a consideration, not a command. In fact, most

counselors have learned that expecting a client to fully digest

the insights given to them usually produces a strong case of

mental indigestion, even though it may make the therapist feel

that they have accomplished much in the moment.

As you join in with this process, give yourself time to reflect

on what you read. Not everything will be new to you, but

hopefully much of it will. With that in mind I would like to……

Welcome You to My Office

I’m glad you could make it into my office today. Before we

begin, I want you to know that I am aware that before a client

actually makes their way into my office, they have probably

tried lots of things. Most have read several self help books,

listened to countless advice from friends, and perhaps even

visited other therapists. So I take it pretty seriously that

you’ve made this appointment to come and see me. In truth, this

process is actually more about me sharing things with you and

you taking what fits, rather than simply doing everything I

suggest. If it seems a bit overwhelming, then that is by design.

It’s kind of like a bowl of fruit. I’ll make suggestions and

you take the things that apply to you, and the things that

don’t, you leave them here in my office. So I will give you

more information than you need so that you have plenty to choose

from.

If I might, I’d like to make a guess. I’m going to assume

that you’re tired. Just the fact that you were willing to reach

out for help tells me that you’re ready for your marriage to

improve. I don’t know that I would call you desperate, but I

would certainly call you motivated. While I wouldn’t wish pain

or discomfort or frustration on anyone, that feeling of being

tired is critical for anything to be different in your

marriage. If you’re only annoyed or you feel that everything

is “fine” with your husband, then I must say that I am not

optimistic about your marriage improving. Often in marriages,

things don’t change until at least one person – usually the

wife – has had enough of the way things have been going and

becomes determined in her heart that it will be different. As

much as I’d like your husband to come in here and meet with us,

him being here isn’t necessary for your marriage to improve. If

just one person in the relationship makes changes, it cannot

help but affect the other person––it’s true. Let me give you an

example. Let’s imagine that you and I are sitting here and you

pull a gun out and point it right at my head and tell me, “Stand

up Bob.” You couldn’t, technically, make me stand up, but the

odds are pretty good that I’m not going to just sit here,

whether I want to or not. That gun is going to give you more

leverage on me than if you simply asked or told me to stand up.

Now, I won’t have you do anything as drastic as that with your

husband, and granted that’s an extreme example, but it’s one of

the basic tenets of couples’ relationships. Husbands don’t do

things unless they have to and the person who can affect a man

the most is his wife. A husband and wife are actually closer to

being one unit than they are two people, and what has an effect

on one person in the marriage cannot help but influence the

other one, whether they want to be influenced or not. So even

though this information might seem strange, it’s been tried on

countless husbands. What I ask from you in return is to give it

a chance to sink in. If it doesn’t make sense initially, that’s

because it’s a different way of thinking. If it made complete

sense, then I would only be telling you something that you

already know. Anything new, by definition, is going to be a

little unnerving, is going to be a little awkward, as it takes

your mind a few moments or sometimes a few days or weeks to

grasp exactly how to apply it to your marriage. I’m going to be

giving you the opportunity to see some things through your

husband’s eyes and if you understood this completely, that would

make you a man - it would make you a husband. So part of my job

is to overwhelm you a little bit with new information. If you’re

puzzled, it means you’re responding correctly.

He Married You – That Means a Lot

I want to start with one thing as an overriding principle, and

even though there are rare exceptions to this, I can tell you

that the fact that your husband married you means he wants your

marriage to work and he wants it to be wonderful. Some women

seem to think men are dumb when it comes to relationships,

though we’re not dumb. In fact, to some degree, we men have

worked really hard to cultivate that belief because it tends to

make us less responsible for things. Men (there are rare

exceptions of course) don’t go into a marriage hoping it doesn’t

work out or viewing the arrangement as merely a trial and error

type of thing. When a man gets married, he crosses over a huge

threshold. In many respects, it is similar to making a major

financial investment because of the risks involved with pledging

himself to a woman for life. Once he is married, there is a

woman in his life who can now hurt him and injure him in a way

no one else can. It isn’t that a man believes that his wife

wants to hurt him, it’s just that she could. In addition, men

also can’t stand to fail. If they don’t think they can make a

woman happy, and if they don’t think they can succeed in it,

they tend to withdraw from the relationship before it even gets

to marriage. And from all the husbands I have spoken to –– they

all say the same thing––that just the thought of failing at

marriage is excruciatingly painful. “Why try and make your wife

happy, when nothing seems to work?” is how one husband stated

this fear to me.

But why was he so charming and fearless when you were dating?

Is it perhaps that you were easier to please…Possibly? I’d like

you to consider that possibility, at least from his perspective,

especially since you, as a woman, are probably better at

understanding the intricacies of a relationship than your

husband could ever hope to be. That’s the main reason why most

of my clients are women. So if I had to pick between either

seeing you or your husband in my office, I would choose you,

because I can make faster progress with you than with him.

Now, are there any questions you have for me or is there

anything I didn’t give you a chance to ask? No? Okay. Please

give all that I have said to you a few days to consider. Most of

my clients tell me that their best insights occur outside of

their session; once they’ve had time to contemplate all that was

said. I’ll look forward to seeing you again.

Did you like what you have read so far?

Here’s what you’ll discover in the rest of What Husbands Cant Resist.

You’ll learn what motivates him.

What makes him feel vulnerable and why that makes you special His Heart – not his head – choose you.

What his Greatest Need and Strongest Desire is and how to fulfill it.

A proven communication technique that will bring you both closer together.

What Sex means to him – probably not what you think And So Much More…….

Here’s what other women have said:

What Husbands Cant Resist is extraordinary must read for any woman in a marriage or planning to be in one. Bob has found a unique way to translate how husbands think and act into words only woman's heart can fully understand. More than just "why he does what he does" What Husbands Cant Resist is a truthful and psychological understanding of the male mind and heart which will empower wives with incredible insider knowledge and loving empathy. The wonderful news is husbands DO have deep loving feelings, and Bob is now your expert guide to help you understand what your husband really wants you to know (if he only knew how to say it). – Julie

I can’t thank you enough for writing this book! I had no idea how my husband felt about some of the things you mentioned. It was incredibly eye opening! – Susan

Bob, this is your best book yet. I’ve tried several of your suggestions on my husband (without telling him) and he hasn’t said much in response- he’s just been nicer and more affectionate with me. I can’t believe that men are this simple. Ha-Ha. – Maria

Attract, Reconnect and get your husbands Affection back with What Husbands Cant Resist


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